Summer Program Drama!

It's difficult to explain the kind of mood I'm in. I'm tired, but giddy at the same time, and I'm not even really sure why.

The past few days have been...interesting.

We started our summer program Monday. The children are WONDERFUL-- only one or two trouble makers in the bunch, nothing we can't handle. They are energetic, and joyful, and so hilarious. One of the little boys today was running around playing a game of tag and holding his pants up the whole time-- ADORABLE!

The people I'm working with are great-- Martha, Pauline, and Linda are too funny to be around. Linda's the queen of little snide remarks, which Martha pays no attention to and Pauline encourages by saying something feisty right back. Needless to say, we have a good time around here.

I have had a difficult encounter with one of the volunteers (and I'm not sure if it's wise to put this out there in cyberspace where anyone can read it, but in the spirit of Anne Lamott, I'm sticking with candidness, for better or worse I suppose..)

So I'm helping the volunteer make copies the other morning and she asks nonchalantly, "How many do you suppose are illegals?" I guess the question didn't strike me as funny right off the bat-- Pastora Martha has been talking to me very openly about the families' circumstances, in order to give me an understanding of where they come from and why. Plus, I figured if the woman's helping with the summer program, she must have a heart for the kids, or a desire to help, a sense of the injustice of their situations, and a yearning to make things better for them. So young, naive me replies, "Oh, I think every one of them. None of the parents put their socials on the registration forms."

And this lady who I think is on our side, who I think is here to help, and nurture, and advocate for these children, rolls her eyes and goes on a rant about "how much public school space these children are taking up, how high property taxes are these days because of it," and how the only reason she's here is so, "maybe they'll atleast learn something here and keep from draining even more money out of the system because they need special teachers who will work at a slower pace for them."

I smiled and nodded, inwardly shocked. I left the room with a, "well I think the copier's working for ya now," wishing I had a backbone enough even just to offer my perspective or to share some of the stories I've learned about these children who have names, and identities, interests, dreams, and reasons why their families are where they are.

I'm trying to let go of the comments she made and be grateful for the set of extra hands (although it's difficult when she sings "God Bless America" everytime the children pass by..); yet God's gentle, patient, loving voice continues to remind me not to judge, or be hardened, or put up unnecessary boundaries between myself and others. I just hope the God that's blowing that voice in my ear will also give me the strength/humility/willingness to do what it says..

In addition to all that hooplah, I've come down with some sort of bug (go figure!) So although the last couple days have been exciting, I'm looking ahead even more excitedly to the days I can work with the kids and feel well, and have the energy to run around and play tag/duck-duck-goose/whatever other crazy games they seem to take joy in. Pray that I get over whatever it is I've come down with and that my immune system kicks in and does a better job in the weeks to come! (Pray also that God can subdue the judgemental side in me this summer, so I may gain a better understanding of where my patriotic song-singing volunteer is coming from, and so we may work together and serve these beautiful children, and let them know they are loved, and valued, and completely priceless, just as they are, in the eyes of God.)

Peace and Love!

Nicole